Bitter Irony and a Confession

Those of you who know me find yourselves rolling your eyes in exasperation every time you ask me, "Have you seen [this show]?" and then remember that no, of course not - if it is a show, featured on a television, I have not seen it. On the rare occasions that television and I have crossed paths, it's because it was on at someone else's house while I was visiting. Even as a child, I watched television if someone else happened to be watching it, but the idea of having to sit down in front of the TV at a certain time every week to watch a certain show freaked me out. I never wanted to be held hostage by a flashy talking box. It's not the quality or content of TV programming that bothers me; I know there's lots of good stuff to see that I am missing out on. It's just the scheduling, the commitment, the obligation that bothers me. Times have changed, of course; there's TIVO and stuff...but that kind of television-watching technology, again, takes commitment.

This aside, I have to admit that the whole reason I ever picked up knitting needles was television. It was after college, my dad was sick, I was keeping him company...in front of the television. Day after day, hour after hour, we watched the Discovery channel at a volume so high it made the walls shake. It was torture. TORTURE. Then, one fateful day as I was cleaning up around my mom's house, I found some ancient, magenta, plastic Boye knitting needles and came to a crossroads: I could use those needles to gouge my eyes and eardrums out so that I would not have to experience the television anymore, OR I could use them to keep my hands busy. I had always wanted to learn to knit, so the more constructive option won.

That's not the real confession, though - it gets worse. I got a spinning wheel, right? Well, it's really hard to spin for hours at a time with nothing else going on around me. I mean, spinning is delightful and fascinating...but it's pretty repetitive. It's a great tool for meditation in that respect; it's so nice to sit down at the wheel and think through all the stuff in your life that needs thinking through. I'm about as deep as my coffee mug, though, so after about five minutes of that crap, I'm ready to put a movie on.

Cable is still useless to me; I hate remote controls and having to be in the right place at the right time to see what I want to see...but Netflix, oh Netflix. I can plop my wheel down in front of the computer and "Watch Instantly" anything I want online and pay attention to it in a very half-assed way as I enjoy spinning. That's just the irony part, though. The confession is this:

I've been watching TV shows on Netflix. It started with Doctor Who, because my friends like it, but now it's spreading to other things, stuff that people have been watching for ages, but I'm only just discovering. 30 Rock, Heroes, Dexter. (I am NOT "just like Dexter", people. Stop saying that. He's a MAN, for goodness' sake.)

I'm not sorry, though; I get a boatload of knitting and spinning done, and I don't have to be monogamous to a television-machine this way.

(You guys want to suggest any good television shows I should catch up on? First person to say "Lost" gets slapped.)